So, it’s almost time to say hi to the Big Fat Fella as he comes down the chimney, but that also means it’s officially time to dust off the dodgy joke books.
Here at Chatoffee we’ve trawled the archives to find the 10 best (or worst?) Christmas cracker jokes that hopefully you’ve not heard too many times before!
10. What’s the difference between Bono and Santa?
Santa gives you things you want
9. Why would you invite a mushroom to a Christmas party?
He’s a fun guy to be with
8. Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy
7. “Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud”
“Yes sir, it’s fresh ground”
6. What’s the best Christmas present you could receive?
A broken drum, you just can’t beat it
5. What’s round and bad tempered?
A vicious circle
4. What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer
3. Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars?
He gets to open the door to number 10
2. Why was the snowman looking through the carrots?
He was picking his nose
And, drum roll please…..in first place:
1. What’s ET short for?
Because he’s only got little legs